A Philisophical Question

If you could be on any reality show, which one would it be?

I was having this discussion with a friend last night while watching the mole. I feel somewhat hypocritical posing this question, as a formerly staunch opponent to all things reality TV related. However, the current state of TV has a great deal of quality scripted programming. High-intensity serialized dramas, smart and hilarious comedies with amazing casts (plus, i haven’t seen an ad for “According To Jim” in forever, which leads me to believe it might not be on), as well as great stuff on cable. There’s enough stuff on TV that I actually enjoy where I’ll put up with Vh1’s newest version of “C-Level Celebrity Spreads Syphilis” or whatever is on E! these days.

But aside from the aforementioned STD spreading specials, i think it might actually be kind of cool to be on a reality show. Kinda lame, but still cool in an “I am extremely vain and secretly want to be famous” kind of way. But I wondered which show I would want to be on.

I don’t have any skills that would lend themselves to a reality competition per say. I mean, there was that director show a few years ago, but I’m not good enough (plus I’m rusty as hell) to have any shot at something like that. I can’t cook to save my life so no cooking shows. I can’t sing, no idol. I fucking know I can’t dance (so does anyone who’s seen me try), I don’t have talent (at least not any that would impress Sharon Osbourne or The Hoff). I secretly (or not so secretly, depending on if i’ve actually told you this) wish I could be the Last Comic Standing, but despite how hilarious I come off in print on screen I am painfully unfunny in person. I just really miss the mark, a lot. So basically any contest that takes a skill would be out.

There are the “regular people doing ridiculous shit to try to win money at the end” shows. I fucking do not want to live in the wilderness for like 4 months, so no Survivor thank you very much. I DEFINITELY do not want to race around the entire damn world. The Mole would be cool, but I don’t pay close enough attention and I tend to be extremely gullible trust people so I would probably suck at it. If I am gonna be on one of these shows, I damn well want to stick around to get my full 15 minutes dammit! (side note: i love during reunion episodes when the first few people to get the boot just sit there the whole time.)

I think competition shows might not be my cup of tea. I guess I would have to be a show where I don’t get thrown off for being completely incompetent. If it was still on, I think Road Rules would have been an awesome show to be on. I mean, there was the whole travel thing, but it seemed fun. The shit they had to do was wild. And it would have probably been really cool to be on. Oh well.

Showing up on a few episodes of The Hills could be interesting, but thats a totally different story.

I feel like I am left with The Real World. For as ridiculous it has gotten since its original inception, it would still be absurdly fun to be on. I mean, you basically just act like an ass on television for a few months. I mean, they don’t even seem to have a “job” anymore. Its just going out and getting drunk. It seems like it could be really fun. It also seems like it could be fucking awful when I say something snarky and piss off a ‘roid head and take an elbow across the face. I mean, getting layed out on television would probably be extremely embarrassing. They would probably use it to promote the series and shit like that. I mean, it would literally be seen by every 15 year old in the country. That would suck. But it seems like the best option for me to be psuedo-famous. It’s not like I would have to travel far for it.

Anyone out there have a reality show they would sell their soul and dignity be on?


3 Responses to “A Philisophical Question”

  1. I used to loathe all reality TV as well. But now– to my horror– I am addicted to, Farmer Wants a Wife. Yeah. I know…But I can’t help it. There is something frighteningly humorous about watching city girls working on a farm, let alone, thinking that they’re really falling in love on national television.

    And for the record. I’d totally be on Survivor.

  2. ya know if you took an elbow to the face, you’d get that ‘roid head kicked off the show.. now who has the power?

  3. wishmewell Says:

    @ Mckenzie
    i actually haven’t seen that yet, i’ve heard nothing but good things (albeit ironically)

    yeah, but my pride would be damaged beyond repair. and what if i messed up my nose. i’m told its cute

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